I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
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