omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
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