I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize