If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
His hands were made for my vagina.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
