Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
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