I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Randomize
