im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
