it wasn't lemon gatorade
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
There's always time for handjobs
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
