69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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