I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize