So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
