dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
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