Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
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