it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
