Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Randomize
