now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
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