Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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