my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
