I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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