Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
The feeling are messing with the penis
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize