what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
