sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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