whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize