Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize