mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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