Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I would ride that face into the sunset
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
