why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
false alarm, still single
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
