i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize
