hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
