i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
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