I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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