awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
