Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
