I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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