You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
she told me i tasted like america
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
