Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
