do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
