I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
My liver just had a heart attack.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
