She said her name was "party"
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Randomize
