Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I skipped work to stalk him.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize