He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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