it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
