oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
