I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
