no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
