Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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