When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Semen is not good for contacts.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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