Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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