we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
