I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
